TOFURKY

TOFURKY??? Are you kidding me?

My new favorite grocery store to shop in is Trader Joes. If you are unfamiliar, it's a small grocery store with several locations throughout the US, but headquartered here in SoCal. It's a "neighborhood" type grocery store. They buy direct from the suppliers and brand their own products. So instead of buying Kellogg's Corn Flakes, you'll buy Trader Joe's corn flakes. I think it's the coolest thing ever. Most of the food is all-natural/organic... so kind of like Whole Foods but not over-priced. OKay, TJ plug over.

So anyway, everyday for lunch, I go into my neighborhood Trader Joes and buy a Chicken Caesar Salad and a bottle of water for lunch. I end up paying $3.99 for my entire lunch - fantastic. Well, I was in there today and the girl at the checkout counter proceeds to tell me all about "TOFURKY." Tofurky is creatively crafted from a revolutionary tofu-wheat protein blend, carefully seasoned, and 100% vegan. It "rightly mimics the real thing."

Are you kidding me??

I smiled and nodded along as she told me all about the amazingness of this years Tofurky, while acting like it was revolutionary - you know, just being polite. Trying to find interesting that which she is so passionate about. But then she straight up asks me, "So you think you might give it a try this Thanksgiving?!"

I was like, "um, ... no, probably not. I look forward to eating the real thing on Thanksgiving all year long. I'm pretty fond of real turkey." She laughed kind of awkwardly and said, "You're like 'Nah I like grease!' " I just smiled and laughed and went on my way. But I was like GREASE? Seriously? Thanksgiving is TURKEY DAY! Not Tofurkey Day. Eating Tofurkey on TURKEY DAY would be like buying only a salad at Ruth's Chris Steakhouse. Or like driving 12 hours to the beach, only to spend your entire time in the swimming pool next to the ocean.